Wedding to remember

 On August 11, 2023, which would’ve been my parents’ 72nd wedding anniversary, I was blessed to attend the wedding of my niece, Ciara, and her wonderful partner, Jack. The wedding took place at Cloughjordan, County Tipperary, Ireland, at a gorgeous venue called Cloughjordan House. 

On the morning of the wedding, after a breakfast of French toast (me), granola (Nick), and avocado toast with poached egg (Paul and Liz), we ventured into the town of Nenagh. First we found an ATM to be able to repay a loan we needed to get back to the hotel last night. We stopped in a sporting goods store to find gear for our upcoming trip to the Rugby World Cup. We visited a castle - all that remains is a tower that Paul and Liz climbed. Report: very windy at the top. We saw a church where there was a funeral happening and another church less than a block away. (We later learned the big one was the Catholic Church and the other a Reform church.) I found navigating the town rather disconcerting - loads of traffic and not so many crosswalks. We finished our self-guided tour and returned to the Abbey Court Hotel to dress for the wedding. We ran into Mary’s sister-in-law, Gronya, at the hotel. Later we met her husband and sons, Gavin and Adam. Much later, I enjoyed talking about rugby to one of them, that I insisted on calling “Gavin-Adam” since at that point, I couldn’t keep them straight. 

Mary had hired a “bus” from the Abbey Court to Cloughjordan House, that actually was 2 vans. We saw a lot of people we didn’t recognize milling about. When the vans arrived, they boarded, and we did too. I was seated up front and called back Are you going to Jack and Ciara’s wedding too? to which a number said yes, and one joker said, We are now! 

We arrived at the venue and immediately found Jack’s friend who had loaned us the 10 euro note the night before. We were told the bar would be closing soon if we wanted something before the ceremony, which we did. However, we no sooner than received our drinks when someone told us it was time to go to the ceremony. Leslie the wedding planner was at the door of the little building saying we couldn’t bring our drinks into the ceremony. Chugging before the Irish wedding seemed the only thing to do. 

There were about 150 guests in the room. There was a guitar player and keyboardist up front doing mostly instrumental versions of songs I recognized, including Van Morrison. The celebrant, a woman about 45, with a lovely Irish brogue, and Jack were up front. There was a photographer and videographer up front milling about. There were 2 chairs at an angle, for Jack and Ciara. Mary, Mike, Caitriona and Brian were in the front row. The celebrant announced that no photos were allowed during the ceremony and to turn all phones off and put them away.  I snuck a quick photo of Ciara as she walked down the aisle but otherwise complied. While Jack and the celebrant waited for the bride to enter, the videographer accidentally bumped a tall vase of flowers and it crashed onto Ciara’s chair.  They quickly uprighted the vase but it fell again. Caitriona told me later that Ciara sat in the wet chair without flinching. Caitriona held the flowers for the duration of the ceremony and the celebrant announced that we were starting the wedding with some drama. After a long wait (maybe caused by a guest on the phone outside who was duly chastised and told to take her seat), Ciara entered. Of course she looked stunning and very happy. The ceremony was absolutely wonderful. It was completely personalized to Ciara and Jack and included the story of their romance - they had broken up and then got back together - and many quotes of things they had said about each other. For example, she said, Three of Ciara’s favorite things about Jack are . . . and Jack told me he wouldn’t change a thing about Ciara. Ciara had said she’d change the way Jack cuts his food into baby size pieces before eating. There was a very sweet tribute directed at Mary. After their break-up, Jack and Ciara ending up both working at the Law Reform Commission, and she said it was similar to the opening line from Casablanca: Out of all the Law Reform Commissions in the world, you had to walk into mine. This got a big laugh from the Law Reform Commission crowd. At the beginning, the celebrant asked who has never been to an Irish wedding. About four of us shyly raised our hands. She (correctly) predicted that we were going to have an amazing experience and asked everyone else in the crowd to watch out for us and make sure we had fun. At one point Jack and Ciara got up, faced each other and read the vows they had written. They also exchanged rings. There were a couple readings by friends and family, which were different from those I have traditionally heard. One by Carl Sagan’s wife for example. Near the end, the celebrant said they were going to excuse themselves to sign the paperwork, and we should talk amongst ourselves and listen to a song by the musicians. They didn’t even leave the room - just went to a table and did the signing. Note to self: use this technique next time you officiate a wedding to ensure the license gets signed timely. Then after a few more words, the happy couple kissed and processed down the aisle to the song Everywhere by Fleetwood Mac.  Everyone present joined in “wahooooo, I want to be with you everywhere.” It was delightful and easily the best wedding ceremony I’ve ever witnessed. (Caitriona and I agreed that previous ceremonies, including our own were “crap”.)

We then went to a large lawn area where games were set up, like cornhole and ping pong. Large friendly dogs were roaming around - explaining the Please don’t feed the dogs sign. There was a large tent with bar tables and a big Jenga game. Appetizers and drinks were passed. Ciara and Jack’s bicycle built for two was nearby with disco-ball type helmets, but I didn’t see them ride it. Apparently their dog, Bumbagh (means bumblebee) was there for a little while, and there was a tiny disco ball helmet for him, too. There was a bit of rain so we mainly stayed in the tent and enjoyed visiting with Mary’s friends. 

Soon it was time to go in for dinner, and it was a delicious spread. The entree was a delicious chicken, and dessert was cheesecake - no traditional American wedding cake. Also no clinking glasses to get the couple to kiss. The tables were beautifully decorated with peach colored runners (not dyed in Mary’s bathtub, though they asked) and dried orange slices with your place tag. We sat next to Mary and across from Ciara and Jack. After dinner, one of their friends gave a hilarious speech, complete with a barrister collar (? Not sure - it looked like a white bib). I whispered to Mary that I hoped she didn’t have to follow that speech and she gulped and said she did. Ever the diplomat, Jack announced a 5-minute break before the next speech. Mary gave a sweet and fitting speech welcoming Jack to the family and saying she hoped they could share the peace they found together with the world. Jack’s dad followed with a speech full of anecdotes about his and Jack’s life and insights into the area, and something about Prince Andrew. He just sat down when the band started in the next room. They were great. They played many covers like Sweet Caroline and other great dance music. Ciara was dancing up a storm as was her brother Mike. I had no idea my quiet nephew was such a crazy and talented dancer. Lorkin’s wife Siobhan also was a whirling dervish. I did not witness the Bride break dancing, but other witnesses confirmed it. Ciara had changed after dinner into a sparkly long white dress. 

Many people were sporting the temporary tattoos that the couple provided, and there was an old fashioned rotary phone where you could record a message for Ciara and Jack. Nick left one with our running joke about his trying on the wedding dress which had been delivered to our condo in McFarland. There was also a Photo Booth with fun props. 

We decided to catch the 11:45 van back to the Abbey Court, where we had a nightcap with Paul and Liz and turned in. It was a wonderful experience and I’m so glad we were able to share Ciara and Jack’s special day. 

Photos above include one of my cousin Paul McBride’s daughter, Maureen, who got married In Pennsylvania the same week as Ciara in the same dress! We think they are third cousins. As Mary remarked, good taste runs in the family.